why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
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