and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Randomize