Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize