yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
do nipples grow back?
Randomize