WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
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