This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize