Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
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We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
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The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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