they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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