I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Randomize