It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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