Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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