apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
i would one night stand the shit outta him
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When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
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He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
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