hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
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