I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
I just threw up on my dentist
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
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