I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
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