I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
My lunch today consisted of going on the brewery tour with my boss. Free pretzels and two free beers.
I hate you.
To be fair, the beers are only 8 ounces each. So maybe you just kinda dislike me.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
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I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
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Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
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