who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize