yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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