Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
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