You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
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