His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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