oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
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