Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Randomize