Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Randomize