Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize