she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
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