My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize