just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
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