I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
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