Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
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