what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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