And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Let's get the cat blown out
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Randomize