Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
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I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
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I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
Randomize