Its about making memories worth repressing
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize