lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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