Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
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I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
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"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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