Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
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