feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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