Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
someone threw a dead crab at me
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
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