It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize