I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize