I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Someone came in the potted fern
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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