is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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