I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
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