She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize