I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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