Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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