even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
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