the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
I need water and some morals
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