just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Randomize