Whod you bang
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
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